BEAUTY FROM ASHES

…Singleness is not loneliness

Recently, I suffered from a breakup. When you enter into a relationship, you never think about breaking up or the fact that the relationship might not work out.

I entered into this relationship knowing full well the difficulties we would face such as distance (we’re from different countries), the time zones, and the fact that it would be a while before we would see each other again. But I knew that it was God’s will, and besides, both of our families and pastors had already given their approval and blessing. I knew that with God’s grace and strength, we could make this work.

I won’t go into much detail. A few months after trials and arguments, the thread on which we were walking, snapped. It was unexpected yet unavoidable. I can plainly see now that it was all God’s will. Yet, at that time, I couldn’t understand the reason for which God allowed us to breakup. I asked myself over and over again: “How could God possibly allow us to meet each other, fall in love, start getting ready for our wedding–only to break us up in the end?” I have been praying throughout this time that God heal both of our hearts and help us have closure. It hasn’t been easy but I have seen how God has drawn me out of depression and has now given me peace and the understanding that He knows what is best for me.

About a few days ago, I started reading a devotional concerning breakups and relationships. I felt God speak to me through these encouraging words: Breaking free After a Breakup: “You may want to continue the friendship with this person and God may very well be calling you to do that. Maybe you are able to walk right into a friendship with the individual, but chances are, you will need time in separation for God to operate on your heart.” I won’t deny it—I have had the urge to ask how he is faring but I know that it will only hinder our healing.

The devotional continued by saying: “Despite the abuse you might have experienced, you miss the sense of belonging to someone. Although being single can feel uncomfortable now your patience is important during this season. Fight the urge to suddenly jump into a relationship for the sake of convenience and comfort. It’s important to recognize that singleness is not loneliness and it should not bring you any fear or embarrassment. Singleness is actually very sacred and God wants you to honor this tie by giving it completely to Him. God cares about your love life. He gave us the greatest love story ever, by giving us Jesus.”  Oh, this couldn’t get any truer. I know I’m lacking in patience; no wonder it’s a virtue. For sure and for certain, I still have a ways to go in my journey of healing and closure.

God has been so wonderful. Now, I’m starting to understand that He wants this season in my life to be one of seeking His presence, and falling in love with Him first. But it requires my full attention—no distractions of any kind…including a relationship. God has to mold me even more and help me mature spiritually so that when I enter into a relationship again, I can love with true love that can only come from first falling in love with the King of kings.

Despite the pain that we may be feeling, despite the loneliness that surrounds us, despite the urge we might have to be with someone, let us never forget that there is a season for everything under heaven. God will always have a reason for allowing certain things to happen. The only way that a seed can start shooting forth is if it dies first. The only way that a clay mug can be used is by going through a series of heat exposure. The only way that a diamond can be used for a ring is by being cut.   

Ask yourself: “Is God allowing me to pass through this pain so that I can find joy and true love in His presence?” The greatest love story we can ever be a part of is to fall in love with the Prince of Peace, the King of kings; and He wants us to be a part of it!!       

#truelove #relationships #letgo #breakups #singlelife #lovegod #trust_theprocess #zerotohero